If the ho's bothering you why not just ejaculate on her back?

I still get lots of hits from people searching for stuff on "Soulja Boy," a teenaged rapper popular in the States now. Last year I did a little compare and contrast between him and the Wonder Girls, who had become popular in Korea a few months earlier. They're not without similarities: the Wonder Girls are teens as is Soulja Boy, both appeal to the same age groups, and both have spawned dance crazes in their respective countries. Though I acknowledge the problems some people have with the Wonder Girls and the way the were sexed-up and marketed, I did and do object much more to "Soulja Boy," whose image and message was and is much more repulsive.

After all, when the Wonder Girls first came out we didn't have the lengthy, thoughful criticism of the sort done by Gusts of Popular Feeling or by James Turnbull at The Grand Narrative (here, here, and here). Rather, people were just annoyed that the band was derivative, were over-played, or that they couldn't sing or dance. As Feet Man Seoul said back in November:

So, I'm just gonna say it: the Wonder Girls have no talent. None. Oh, come on. Don't get mad. Just think about it objectively for a minute. They can't sing AT ALL and they can't dance to SAVE THEIR LIVES. Do you remember their first live performance of "Tell Me"? It was terrible. Horrible. I'm scarred for life. On my eyes. And not using Michael Jackson or someone as the standard, because Korea has enough good dancers to compare with, from all the way back to Seo Taiji and the Boys to Boa and Lee Hyori. They can at least perform decent dances. But what is all this "shaky shoulder dance" crap? So they wiggle suggestively in sync? Whoa – what a concept. *I* can do that, and I'm in my mid-thirties with a gut. I just have to channel my old Kid-n-Play/MC Hammer moves made in front of the TV, but if you give me a few minutes and the motivation, I CAN do the Wonder Girls dance. And what's with them being 14 Western age? That's just pervy, dude, since the two 14-year-olds LOOK 14. We're not talking Britney at 17 with the tongue-in-cheek schoolgirl video – we're talking Jodi Foster in Taxi Driver with the disturbingly bad makeup job. Eww."

And:

So, my point? I’ll make it simple. The Wonder Girls can’t dance. And watching people who can’t even perform the dance that even the original stars can’t dance right to doesn’t do anything for me. And before you say I’m too harsh on the Wonder Girls, let me just say that since JYP made both the dance and THEM, he’s the logical standard of comparison. The way it should be, is the girls should have made the dance sexy and their own, while JYP remains funny and charming doing it for fun sometimes on stage. As it is, he’s much better than his protegées, who are about as sexy as the middle school girls I see in uniforms walking down the street every day. Eww.

There was some attention paid to the girls' ages and their image, but mostly people were getting pissed AND WRITING LIKE THIS because they---thirty- and fortysomething-year-old adults---found a teeny-pop group lame, and considered, like older people everywhere do, that the pinnacle of music and fashion happened when they were 17, back when their favorite bands were still a little older than they were.

While the Wonder Girls made it big with the song "Tell Me," Soulja Boy's big hit "Crank That" had the line "Superman that ho" in the refrain, which means to cum on a girl's back and stick a towel to her. Talk all you want about what the Wonder Girls mean for young Korean women and girls, but I find a guy like Soulja Boy a little more troubling. He has been considered among the musicians at the vanguard of "retard rap," named one of the nine worst trends of 2007 by this blog.

Living in Korea I usually miss all trends back home, but thankfully my brother passed along Soulja Boy's hit from earlier this year, "Tell em YAHHH." I'm no prude when it comes to language, and am pretty foul-mouthed around here, but what does it say about young people when a song with "YAHHH Bitch YAHHH," "Get out my face ho," and "Leave me alone ho before I have to knock your ass out" in the refrain is a hit. Like I mentioned in my c-and-c, the Wonder Girls are in school, while Soulja Boy is a drop-out. Well, he does include his schoolin' in his latest video:

Man I checked out my report card today man I looked at it man I had all Fs on it I took it back to the teacher told him to throw some Ds on it like that
Soulja Boy up in the building
Throw some Ds on it
I checked out my report card
Throw some Ds on it
I checked out my report card
Throw some Ds on it
Aaaaaa

Me and lots of other people get on acts like the Wonder Girls or Crown J for popularizing and capitalizing on terrible English, but here's a guy with the eloquence of a blowjob, rapping to, let's be honest, a demographic that doesn't need any more of these kinds of role models. He also thought it prudent to name himself after a corruption of the word "soldier" when his country is at war. Nice. You can get more of his lyrics here, including the first verse:

Let me tell you about the life
And how you live when you is a star
Every single place you go
The people run up to your car
Everybody wants to talk, and everybody wants to jive
Everybody wants a handshake, or want a high five
And these ugly girls always got a friend
That wants to talk to you
(Bitch, Yahhh, Yahhh, Trick)
(And your friend, Yahhh, Yahhh Too!)
Ain't got time for chitchat
I'm tryin to get this money
So get up out my face
You shit-breath dummy

I'm proud of myself for handling the language-leeches a little better.